The day started out with a message from my most recent beau of 4 mo. saying that he's engaged! GAG! WTH?! He met her the week after we stopped talking and LESS than 2 mo's later, they are engaged and getting married in September. WTH! I really don't believe this crap happens. "Ah, we saw each other and we just knew... I knew he was the one on our 2nd date... I just can't describe how it feels... I can't believe this happened to me, if it happened to you - I wouldn't believe it was real either!" Really, these are things people say, I am more level headed I guess. Ya, I'd like the Knight on a white horse but... realistically ya gotta to know someone. Peeps are crazy these days.
Work crap - I'm everyone's 'GO-TO' girl and do it ALL! Literally. People I work w/ are rude and ridiculous. THEN... my car. My beloved red Volvo - I try to take such good care of you Aidan (my car) but you keep being SO high-maintenance, and I'd really like to keep you longer than your brothers and sisters! I got my car aligned and the oil changed and washed and drove to Cali 2 weeks ago. Now, my car is shaking when I drive over 45 so I take it in to get the tires balanced and rotated (every 4-6 mo) and dude tells me I need 2 new tires and I'm gonna have a blow-out any second b/c the back 2 are worn down to the metal on the inside. Basically - someone did a shotty job on aligning my car. I've bought tires now 3 yrs in a row! What happened to tires lasting 30K miles? Anywho... on to the perspective.
I was venting to my friend who has a lot of trials herself. i.e. Someone stole parts of her car totalling $4K, then at a work function - her hub caps were stolen, health issues w/ the fam etc. She said, "I keep praying for this to be over". Over? All of 'this'? um, that seems a little dramatic to me. So I went home and pondered that. Pondered deeper than I usually like to go (ha). Car problems, bike accidents, illness, discontentment w/ friends and/or family is NOT worth wishing the whole world would end. I thought, there are SO many things to be happy about. Good friends, your favorite tv show, a manic wagging tail when I come home every day, kisses from kids, knowing who we are, serving others, new shoes, Fridays... etc.
So I decided to put my happy pants on. No more moping and griping and I will work on the not being bitter part. hmmm. So I decided to wake up happy today. I decided to put on make-up (it's been awhile!). I decided to think of how I could ease others burdens. I decided to try to mend friendships. I decided to pray for others instead of thinking about my crap. Today I said to my friend, "thank you for your comment about wanting this all to 'end', it really made me think." She said - "Oh, I didn't mean it thaaaat way! Just that I was at my limit with trials". HA! Well, they way I took it is what I think I needed to hear. It must have been that that's what I NEEDED to see my way out of the fog.
So, not that things are all better over night. I just WANT to wake up happy and not think MY trials are so huge.
Here's to TRYING!!